Unnatural Normality
by rachieroo14
Summary: Sherlock isn't normal, and yet he tries to do normal things. I'm awful at summaries, sorry! established!johnlock Rated T to be safe, for later chapters there may be mild language. I'll take prompts/requests. Read and Review!
1. Chapter 1

John shook his head, shutting the door to the pitifully stocked fridge – well pitifully in his mind, to Sherlock it was marvelous, what with the new bag of eyelids he'd gotten from Molly. He sighed and walked into the living room, setting a list on Sherlock's stomach.

"What is that?"

"It's a list, Sherlock. For groceries."

"I realize it's a list John. Why did you give it to me?"

"I need to go to work. And you're doing nothing so _you _can go get them for once."

Sherlock rolled his eyes. "I'm busy."

"Doing what exactly? You are lying on the couch staring at the ceiling, that doesn't make you busy!" John huffed. Why couldn't he do the shopping? He was just lying there for god's sake!

The taller man sat up, causing the paper to flutter to the floor. "I don't expect you to understand what it's like to be a genius, but you could at least pretend, John."

The doctor crossed his arms. "Sherlock Holmes, go get dressed."

"No."

"Then go to the shop in your dressing gown, I don't bloody well care. Just go. I'll give you ten minutes, and then I'm getting you a cab."

He stood up and stomped past John into their bedroom. A few moments later he emerged in his regular attire and John smiled.

"See, not so hard now, was it?" he smirked.

"Shut up. And go get a damn cab before I change my mind."

John gave Sherlock a quick kiss. "Thank you, love."

He only grumbled in response.

When John got home, it was late. All he wanted was his tea, a shower, and then bed. He put the kettle on and opened the fridge to get milk. He was confused at the multiple jars sitting on the shelves, they weren't part of experiments (the bottom shelf and one drawer were reserved for such things), but they looked really strange. He picked up one and opened the lid, almost throwing up at the scent the rushed out. He covered his nose and replaced the lid, reading the label.

"Sherlock!" he yelled. "Sherlock get out here!"

The sleepy man came out of their room wrapped in a sheet. "What?"

"Why the hell did you buy pickled sardines? And garlic pudding? What is wrong with you?"

He scratched the back of his head. "Well, I thought you might like it."

John laughed. "What...? You forgot the list, didn't you?"

"No, no, of course not. I lost it." He looked almost sheepish. "And I don't pay attention to what's in the house. So I guessed."

"You're ridiculous." John chuckled and shook his head.

**A/N: Okay, so first chapter. Do you like it? Please let me know. I'll be inclined to write more. It's just going to be normal things done by Sherlock Holmes and made not so normal, because he's not normal. I said normal too much didn't I? Probably. Anyways, I'll take any requests or prompts you have for me and do my best to write them Please read and review! I love you!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I'd like to tell you I have some super excuse for not uploading this chapter sooner, because I've had it written for almost a month and half-written since the I uploaded the first chapter. I really am sorry, but I have another chapter in mind that I'll try to upload by the end of the month as I am leaving soon to go and stay in Texas for a week. I'm sure I'll be uploading more once I get my brain together during the school year. Once again, I'm really sorry. *hangs head in shame*.**

No clothes. Sherlock had _no clothes_. How on earth had that happened? It's not like he had a small amount of them.

But alas, everything was dirty. And he was not going to a crime scene in his pajamas or dirty clothes.

Mrs. Hudson was out doing the shopping and John was at work. No one to help him. Fine. He was a genius after all, he could figure out a washer and drier himself.

He gathered up everything that could fit into his arms and dumped them into the washing machine. Sherlock fiddled with the knobs, heavy load? Probably. Cold water or hot? Hmm... Cold.

He set all of the other ones until he was satisfied. How much soap was he supposed to put in? He honestly had no idea, so he dumped about half the box in. At least they'd be clean.

The detective hit start and left to sit down on the couch, pulling John's computer from beneath it and sending a few emails.

"Hey Sherlock." John entered the flat and scrunched his face in confusion. "What's that noise?"

"Don't be daft, I'm doing laundry," he scoffed.

John went into the laundry room and almost slipped on the soap pouring out the top and landing the floor.

"How much soap did you use?" he yelled.

"Not sure. Maybe four or five cups."

John wiped up the excess soup and gathered the bubbles in his hands, washing them down the drain. He came back into the living room.

"You should have phoned," he laughed.

"Oh," Sherlock said with disappointment. "Did I do it wrong?"

John kissed the pouting Sherlock on the cheek. "Yep."


End file.
